Parallel Parenting: How to Co-Parent When You Don’t Like Your Ex

In recent years, experts have put much emphasis on the need to co-parent and avoid conflict between parents after a separation or divorce, in order to serve the best interests of the child. Many states, including the state of Florida, have even changed their laws to provide for co-parenting measures and parenting plans, instead of the traditional custody and visitation model. While this works well for many parents, who are able to equally share in their children’s lives and work together to resolve any issues that arise, this isn’t the case for all parents who separate or divorce. How are you supposed to co-parent when the reality is that you simply cannot get along, no matter how much you try?

The Concept of Parallel Parenting

Fortunately, for parents who simply do not see eye-to-eye on most subjects, including their children, there is a way to co-parent without much issue. Since consistent high conflict between parents never benefits a child, parallel parenting can allow parents to co-parent without the conflict, at least in most cases. In this type of arrangement, parents purposely disengage themselves from one another, and have very little direct contact. While parents still collaborate to make significant or long-lasting decisions about the child, such as medical care or education, they allow each other to make the day-to-day decisions about parenting the child, without interfering with the other parent’s choices.

Structuring a Parallel Parenting Plan

The degree to which a parallel parenting plan should be structured depends largely on the level of conflict between the parents. As a general rule, the higher the conflict, the more structured the parenting plan should be. If parents are unable to even greet one another cordially or have a conversation, then the parenting plan may need more detail in order to be effective. For instance, a detailed parallel parenting plan should contain specific dates, times, and places for exchanging the children, as well as how to handle it if a parent must be late or absent. Parents may use a neutral third party to help work out major problems or decisions related to the children, such as where to send the child to school. Furthermore, parents should communicate solely via e-mail, if possible, or even by sending a notebook back and forth with the child that allows the other parent to know what has been going on during the child’s time with that parent.

Call Your Fort Lauderdale Family Law Attorney for Assistance Today

The attorneys of the Vanessa L. Prieto Law Offices, LLC know just how complex and emotional legal proceedings regarding children can become. As a result, we are here to meet your legal needs and offer you the advice necessary to handle whatever situation you are facing. Our goal is to develop a strategy for your case that is designed to work toward your goals, as well as your child’s best interest. Consult a Florida family law attorney today, and learn how we can help you with developing a workable parenting plan that is best for your child, as well as all other aspects of your divorce or family law case.